Dusseldorf: Day One

So I’ve made it to Düsseldorf. 

The M6 was buggered, so the journey from Burnley to Birmingham took two hours longer than planned.  Booking a taxi whilst taking a pee at a motorway service station, I took a gamble.  If I could get to Brum airport for 5pm, I should be able to dash through security and make it to the gate with 30 minutes to go. The plan was a success and I even had time for half a Guinness before the gate was called.

“Just half?!” snorted the portly woman behind the bar.

“Yes”, I said calmly, whilst thinking, ‘I’m about to board and it’s none of your sodding business.’

It cost £2.  For half a pint.

Anyway.  The flight was short at just an hour.   Short enough for me to squeeze in another half a pint on the plane.  That cost £4.  For half a pint. 

At the airport I easily caught the S Bahn to the central station (Düsseldorf Hbf).  I had 50c and 25 minutes to spare, so I decided to see what I could get from the platform vending machine.  The large machine had three items in stock.  For 50c I could get a packet of Mentos, so I popped the 50c piece in and pressed 1 and 2 on the key pad.  Number 28 (an empty spiral thingy) turned and bugger all came out. 

Thankfully, the ticket machine was not a thief and, moreover, had the option of English instructions and EUR2.50 was a bargain for the efficient 12 minute ride to the centre of Düsseldorf. 

My first impression is that the people of Düsseldorf seem to speak very softly and then not very much.  After walking onto the main concourse, some random homeless woman asked me for something in a very quiet, almost shy manner.  I just shook my head and she apologised.  Quietly.  The old moustachioed  bloke at the information desk was a little meek. 

“Hullo. Spre-ken sie English?” I offered. 

The moustache didn’t move.

“Do you speak English?"  I asked, in English – wondering if my attempt at German was counter-productive.

The ‘tache twitched... I took that as a yes and asked for a map.  He obliged.  In silence.

Then, whist waiting for the efficient German tram, a softly spoken mad dog lady, with small dog in a pram and another dog on a lead asked very politely for something.  And then apologised after I shook my head.

The hotel’s reviews are accurate.  It is a very efficient and very clean crap hotel.  I don’t think it has been redecorated in several decades.  The staff are helpful.  I seem to have had breakfast added to my booking.  I look forward to seeing how good that is in the morning.

After I dumped my stuff in my Soviet inspired hotel room, I went to Bar Apartment.  It’s a trendy hipster bar.  

My beer, two hipsters and a bicycle

“Ein beer, bitte” I splutted.  The lass behind the bar didn’t speak and gave me a bottle of beer.  The label was plain white with black lettering: “Bier”

 

I sat at the end of a long trendy retro table.  The trendy bar pulled off using old furniture and made it look modern and chic.  The hotel just uses old furniture.  Perhaps the bar’s chandelier and wall-mounted bicycle add something that the hotel’s wood chip wallpaper can’t? 

By the time I ordered my second beer, the lass behind the bar was speaking in English to me.  She was very thoughtful and stopped me from accidentally ordering an alcohol free beer.  What a thoughtful woman. 

Most of the women in the bar were wearing oversized spectacle frames, whilst the men sported beards and jumpers.  I blended in quite well for the only person sat on his own. 

Got back to the hotel room to discover I had forgotten my toothbrush.  Searching through my bag I found a box of matches – not sure how I got those through security.